Thursday 10 April 2008

Trailer Trash: Montage Vs Summer '08....in 3D!

Summer is fast approaching and after last year’s blockbuster malaise, will this years wonderful, weird and, in once case, wrinkly, offerings redeem Hollywood? Take a seat as the Montagers offer talk some trailer trash…

Iron Man



Emma J. Lennox: If you really need to protect yourself, Mr Downey Jr, I hear Charlton Heston is giving away his gun collection.

Joseph Wren: DAAAAH DAAAAH DAH DAAH DAH....Robert Downey Jr. as a superhero?! Count me in, so long as he still gets to be Robert Downey Jr.

Robert Duffin: I like Downey Jnr but he’s teetering close to self-parody and I don’t want to see that in Tony Stark. With Jon Favreu directing, I see this one heading straight for the bargain bin next to Daredevil.


Indiana Jones & The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull



Joseph Wren: What's this stodgy pish posh?? Some crusty old man trying to save the day? Where's his arsenal of CGI blasty stuff? Does he transform into anything? Seriously Indy.... don’t let us down...

Emma J. Lennox: Innnnndiaaaaaaana Jonnnnes. I always knew some day you'd come walking back through my door. I never doubted that. Something made it inevitable. You're not the same man we knew 19 years ago ...I was a child then. I was in love.... sigh.... can this film can live up to the memories? I do hope so.


The Incredible Hulk



Sandra Dupuy: Nothing can equal Ang Lee's really cool cartoony Hulk. Full stop.

Joseph Wren: If Ang Lee couldn't do it, do you really think the director of The Transporter could examine the duality of man? Oh wait, it's a big monster smashy thing now.

Robert Duffin: Ed Norton as Banner? Erm, no. He is also credited as screenwriter so you can definitely count me out, the most overrated actor of his generation.


The Dark Knight



Joseph Wren: Of all of these comic books on film, this one by far looks the most promising. Dark, very dark.

Sandra Dupuy: Heath Ledger on the path to a carefully selected, eclectic, incredible career. What a loss.

Emma J. Lennox: If I was to suddenly die I wouldn't want my last appearance on Earth to be as an evil clown, but there's still a Terry Gilliam film to come, so let's just put it all out of our minds and enjoy the film.


Hellboy 2: The Golden Army



Joseph Wren: Does this mean Del Toro can fund another Spanish Civil War ghost story? Yeah? Cool, let me know when that film comes out. This looks ridiculous.

Sandra Dupuy: Yay, Ronnie's back with his lobster complexion and crazy horns. More visual delight and disenchanted humour from the master of Goth romance. Can't wait!

Robert Duffin: The original evoked Mike Mignola's world perfectly, but lacked a good yarn. Del Toro fought for funding and moved studio to get this made so I hope his efforts pay off. He adores this character and world, and I can't wait to see what he does time time arouund.

Right or wrong? Let us know what you're looking forward to seeing, or tell us why it's better just to stay at home with a Bergman box set.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

If I was to suddenly die I wouldn't want my last film to be a Terry Gilliam one.